Many months ago, 'Cia turned me on to Panera bread and specifically one of their smaller delectables. I've only had this particular goodie two times before, but I knew that it would be forever one of my favorites. The difficult part of enjoying a specific small goodie from Panera is that it only cost $1.99 and the closest Panera is 20 miles away. Hardly worth the trip for one little guilty treat. Luckily, on Monday last, a new Panera opened about a mile from my house as the crow flies, about 3 miles away by car. The new Panera is near the new Wal-Mart and a bunch of other stores in an area of town that sat vacant for decades because of contaminated ground after a factory was torn down at that location. SOPops says it was a plastics factory, but I only ever remember an empty field there.

Not to have my normal routine interrupted by the fact that I have endulged this morning and the fact that I'm typing this update as I go, I turn on the TV to watch my Sunday morning political programs. Unfortunately, it is too early for the first of them which appears on FOX. Everything is in place. Stupid was fed and outside. Diz was fed and... somewhere. The coffee is hot and fresh and poured into my favorite mug. I am on the couch with my notebook in my lap and some drivel on the TV serving as background noise.

I had put the bag from Panera on the couch when I came in the door and it is there, still. Calling. The top of the bag had been folded over at an odd little angle when it was handed to me. This serves to keep the bag closed. As I pick it up, it crinkles. The bag itself is about the same weight and thickness of your average brown paper lunch bag, but the contents are not average at all. I reach into the bag and pull out the included napkins. There are four of them. I suspect that the man who waited on me at Panera has seen me eat before, though I didn't recognize him.

The Panera looked like any other Panera inside. There were two college-aged people, a guy and a girl, standing behind the counter probably flirting with eachother between customers. They didn't appear bored or annoyed that I had interruped anything, nor did she appear glad to have something to distract her male coworker from his flirting. Or, maybe there was no sexual tension between them at all. I can't say for sure. The young man was short and balding and he had a goatee. When I didn't see what I wanted right away, he greeted me and asked if I needed assistance. I said Cobblestone and he said, "Here." Pointing to them. I told him that I needed one and he bagged it as I shuffled to my left where I would pay the young lady at the register. She was tall and thin with blonde hair that was up in a pony tail, probably due to health regulations. I gave her two dollars to cover the $1.99 charge and when she gave me the penny in change, I plunked it into some charity donation thing sitting on the counter. I don't even know to what I donated. Perhaps I gave money to "End women's sufferage." Perhaps it was "Eat baby seals." I don't really care. I have several pennies in my pocket and I won't miss another one.

I tear off a bulging section of the muffin's crown and watch the caramelized apple or raisin-stuff stretch from the mass of the muffin to the little tear-off that I've selected. A piece of icing breaks off and falls to the tabletop. I eat that before taking a bite of the tear-off piece. The outside of the crown on a Cobblestone Muffin is crunchy and the inside is as soft as any fresh loaf of bread. Intending to take the first bite of the first tear off, I lift the morsel to my mouth with the crusty outside to the top and the softer part down. As I bring the piece closer, I twist it once to see what the contents look like. There are four average size raisins scattered across the backside and a streak of caramelized apple along the bottom... or maybe it's honey. On the base of the muffin, the part that I tore off left behind a naked soft section of exposed bread that will taste as delicious as the tear off piece. I press my upper teeth into the crusty top and squeeze down letting my lower teeth sink into the softer part of the morsel. Immediatly, I can taste raisin and apple as the softer part of the muffin touches my tongue and a moment later, I taste the icing. I bit it almost exactly in half. I can hear the crunching of the muffin's crust as I devour my treat. Perhaps it is the sweetness of the combined ingredients, perhaps it is biting into a crisp and crunchy catalyst for soft apples and baked raisins and honey, perhaps it is all of those things and the heat of the coffee in my mouth, perhaps it has more to do with the memories of my first Cobblestone and with whom I shared it, or perhaps it is all of those things. I'm not sure. But, I do know that the Cobblestone Muffin from Panera is as good as morning sex. Yet, easier to obtain.

Tearing off a second piece to enjoy requires that I either assult another section of the muffin, or pull down some of the paper on the bottom. I opt for the latter. The paper rips as I pull it down and I hope not to leave any paper on the tear-away to ruine my next bite. Success! Sort of. One little piece of the crusty outer portion of the muffin has been left behind, attached to the paper. It dangles there looking sad like on of the misfit toys on misfit island. Though, there will be no little dentist-wanna-be elf to save this misfit muffin morsel. I'll get to it in a moment. Not to be discouraged, I bite into the tear-away that actually tore-away wondering if the part that I left behind would taste even better than the part in my mouth, knowing that it will. It does. The third piece I tear off is much larger than the first two and it has far less crusty top than the previous tear-aways. This time, I bite into the bottom part enjoying just the soft, fruit stuffed wheat bread portion of the muffin and it tastes like heaven too.